|
DONNA
ELLIS’
FINGER-prints
are
all
over
the
lives
of
her
two
little
girls.
There
she
was,
with
her
partner,
holding
the
younger
daughter
at
the
girl’s
baptism
at
Joy
Metropolitan
Community
Church
in
Orlando.
For
six
years,
she
coached
the
older
girl’s
little
league
team.
There
are
shoeboxes
full
of
photographs
and
DVDs
of
the
stuff
of
family
life:
the
dance
recitals,
a
trip
to
Disney
World,
and
of
the
younger
girl,
when
she
was
just
3
years
old,
running
through
a
gaggle
of
geese
at
the
petting
zoo.
And
there
is
Ellis,
eating
the
chocolate
cake
baked
by
a
light
bulb
in
the
girls’
Easy-Bake
oven,
shooting
baskets
with
the
girls
in
the
driveway.
These
are
the
tangible
memories
of
a
mother
raising
her
kids.
But
Donna
Ellis
is
no
longer
allowed
to
be
with
the
children
she
spent
nearly
10
years
mothering.
In
fact,
she
has
not
seen
the
two
girls,
the
older
who
is
now
13
and
the
younger
who
is
now
7,
for
several
years.
She
has
been
denied
any
contact
with
the
girls
ever
since
she
and
her
former
partner,
Rachel
Burg,
split
in
2002.
In
the
eyes
of
Florida
law,
Burg
has
the
power
to
keep
Ellis
from
the
girls,
because
Burg
is
the
biological
mother.
Under
Florida
law,
Ellis
was
never
a
parent
to
the
kids
she
loved
and
helped
raise
for
so
long.
FLORIDA
IS
THE
ONLY
STATE
THAT
totally
bans
gay
men
and
lesbians
from
adopting
children.
But
according
to
the
Human
Rights
Campaign,
only
seven
states,
the
District
of
Columbia
and
jurisdictions
of
16
other
states
allow
a
gay
or
lesbian
adult
to
adopt
the
child
of
his
or
her
same-sex
partner.
A
handful
of
states,
such
as
California,
Connecticut,
New
Jersey,
Washington
and
Pennsylvania,
have
family
law
that
recognizes
the
roles
and
rights
of
non-biological
same-sex
parents,
and
have
granted
those
parents
visitation
rights
after
a
break-up,
even
in
cases
when
the
children
had
not
been
adopted.
But
the
vast
majority
of
non-biological
parents
in
a
same-sex
relationship
in
this
country
could
find
themselves
similarly
shut
out
of
their
children’s
lives
after
a
break-up,
just
like
Donna
Ellis.
WHEN
DONNA
ELLIS
AND
RACHEL
Burg
first
met
back
in
1991,
both
women
were
working
as
pediatric
nurses
at
the
Arnold
Palmer
Hospital
for
Children
&
Women
in
Orlando.
Burg
was
married
and
pregnant
with
her
first
child.
But
soon
after
the
first
girl
was
born,
Burg
and
her
husband
divorced.
Burg
and
Ellis
fell
in
love.
In
1993,
they
moved
in
together.
By
1995,
they
had
purchased
a
plot
of
land
together,
and
built
a
home
in
Orange
County,
Fla.
They
named
each
other
as
the
beneficiaries
in
their
wills.
And
they
raised
the
little
girl
together,
sharing
the
responsibilities,
and
joys,
of
motherhood.
After
a
few
years,
the
two
women
decided
they
wanted
to
have
another
child,
through
artificial
insemination.
According
to
Ellis,
they
decided
Burg
would
be
the
birth
mother
because
Ellis
had
rheumatoid
arthritis
and
diabetes.
It
would
be
safer
for
both
the
child
and
the
mother
if
Burg
carried
the
pregnancy.
In
1998,
Burg
gave
birth
to
a
second
little
girl.
The
two
women
gave
the
girl
a
hyphenated
last
name:
Burg-Ellis.
In
the
nearly
10
years
that
the
two
women
shared
their
lives
together,
Ellis
estimates
she
spent
about
$200,000
on
the
children.
Despite
all
this,
in
court
depositions,
Rachel
Burg
has
insisted
that
Donna
Ellis
was
never
a
mother
to
the
children.
Burg
refers
to
Ellis
as
a
“roommate.”
SO
FAR,
FLORIDA
COURTS
HAVE
denied
Donna
Ellis
any
visitation
with
the
children.
The
courts
have
also
denied
her
any
financial
compensation
for
the
10
years
of
time
and
money
she
put
into
raising
the
kids.
Ellis’
lawyer
has
appealed
both
decisions.
But
Ellis’
chances
of
winning
either
appeal
are
slim.
Historically,
the
Florida
courts
have
resisted
recognizing
“de
facto”
parents,
even
in
cases
where
there
was
a
biological
link,
like
when
grandparents
and
parents
have
fought
over
child
custody.
Ellis
has
offered
to
pay
child
support
in
return
for
seeing
her
children
again.
But
Burg
has
declined
that,
too.
In
all
the
media
attention
this
case
has
garnered,
gay
and
lesbian
activists
and
family
law
experts
have
repeatedly
pointed
to
the
fact
that
in
most
of
America,
gay
men
and
lesbians
still
cannot
adopt
the
children
of
their
partners.
No
doubt
this
is
a
huge
problem,
and
would
have
protected
Donna
Ellis.
Activists
also
say
this
case
illustrates
just
why
gay
and
lesbian
couples
need
to
...
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